“Honey, please naw be fast. I don’t want to be late for my flight oh”. That was the voice of my girlfriend Chioma.  I didn’t respond. I dropped the phone I was chatting with and pulled on the knob of the water closet so she could hear the toilet flush. Before I opened the door I heard another notification on the phone and I saw the message from “laundry guy” – alright, meet me at dominos when u drop her off.

It was an unusually cloudy Sunday morning in February, and it was Valentine’s day. Unfortunately, Chioma had received an email from her Boss last night that she should report to Abuja from Lagos for a meeting scheduled to hold on Monday. I and Chioma had been dating for 7 months, and over the last few months, it had become a norm for her to sleep over at my place during the weekends. Given that it was a valentine weekend, and our first valentine together, we both had plans to make it very special. I didn’t know what she had planned for me but I overheard her calling her friends and asking some questions so I was expecting something special from her. On my own part, I was ready to surprise her with a brand new Samsung galaxy 7 edge phone.

One can only imagine how it feels when you have paid for over N300,000 for a phone and the person you bought it for is about to travel to Abuja to stay in the same hotel building with her boss and the rest of his friends. I was not happy about the situation and I was feeling depressed till I got a Whatsapp message from Laundry-Guy. “hi dear, I just stepped into Lagos. Do you have any plans for tomorrow”? Laundry Guy happens to be the name I saved my ex-girlfriend Sandra’s number with. I did so for obvious reasons. I have never cheated on Chioma but I have also never really gotten over my last relationship with Sandra. The relationship came to an end because her dad did not like the idea of his daughter getting married to an up-coming Nigerian musician; talk less of an up and coming Nigerian rapper.

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I was still lost in my thoughts when I heard Chioma scream “honey oh, I will take a cab oh”. I quickly stepped out of the restroom and maintained my straight face – I had not smiled with Chioma all day, even though she had cried, tried to explain the situation to me, and even threatened to quit the job next week. We drove to the airport and arrived around 7pm, she apologized about twenty more times before I dropped her off and went to pick up my ‘Laundry Guy’. I met up with Sandra thirty minutes later and we had some ice cream, I wanted to order pizzas but she insisted that she wanted to cook my favourite meal- boiled beans and plantain with plenty pieces of fish scattered everywhere.

I wasn’t cool with the idea of taking Sandra to the same house I shared with my girlfriend. I tried all I could to let her know I was currently in a serious relationship and even though I still had feelings for her, I was not the type to cheat on my girlfriend. She insisted we went to my place. “someone that really loves and cares about you will never do what she just did to you, trust me, she has something going on with her boss” she said. Maybe I believed her, maybe I did not want to argue with her, or maybe I Just needed to spend time with someone that cared about me, whatever the case was, we drove to my place.

By the time we got to my place it was already dark so it was not too difficult to sneak her to my doorstep without the neighbours noticing.  I was quick to open the door before one of the nosy neighbours spotted us. As I opened the door, the room was really dark so I reached for the light switch to put it on, it came on and… “SURPRISE!!!” … to my utmost disbelief, there was Chioma holding a big wrapped box. She was surrounded by her 4 bosom friends and each one of them had come with a partner. Just as everyone was smiling and my mouth was still wide open, Laundry Guy walked in wearing a short red dress…..

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