Marriage is the oldest institution and was first instituted by God. It takes a day to contract a wedding but marriage is for a life time. Marriage is a beautiful experience that, if possible, each human being should partake of. It is a platform that stretches you to the limits where either your best is harnessed or your worst is exposed.
Becoming one with your spouse takes time and too many people are quick to give up. Declaring your vows does not automatically mean you will live happily ever after. Rather, it means you should commit to waiting on God’s plan to work out in your lives. God is trustworthy and His plans are for our good and not to destroy us, so we can rely on Him to work out everything in our favour.
Happiness is not about finding a spouse who acts right all the time. In fact, such a person does not exist. Your happiness is your responsibility regardless of how your spouse acts.
There are different seasons in every marriage. First is the romantic, honey-moon, and passionate phase. This is when the love is so heady that you even pretend not to see some traits you should be wary of. You believe you have a partner made in Heaven with little or no faults which means you can’t see clearly what you have gotten into. The euphoria of this phase soon dies down as it is fleeting and can’t be sustained forever.
Then comes the season of building a family and establishing a career. This is when the children come in their droves, so many assignments, you hardly have enough sleep, and you are in the process of building an enviable career or business conglomerate.
The next season is when all the children have grown up to live on their own. Here you get to rediscover your spouse again and then fall in love all over. This is because you have all the time to focus on each other.
Then the next phase is when you find some people who haven’t built friendship over the years begin to rethink why they got married in the first place and begin to consider quitting because they don’t want to spend the few years left of their lives in ‘misery’.
However, for those who are willing to roll up their sleeves and work hard on their relationships, while making room for one another, they will definitely look forward to their twilight years together. Having seen the best and worst of each other, they know that no one else knows them better to be able to take good care of them till the end while tolerating their excesses.
Things can go wrong in a marriage in any of the seasons, but if one knows these times are coming, and also knows that they will end, then getting through them becomes a lot easier. If you are at a stage where you feel all hope is lost, please believe God to turn the situation around in your favour because our God is a God of hope who specialises in doing miracles.
Take comfort in knowing that as long as you walk close to God, your sorrow will definitely come to an end. But you must come to a point where you give up – not on your marriage, but on your ability to fix things by yourself. Tell God that your hope is entirely on Him and that because of His great love for you, you will never be disappointed. When you hope in God, you can never be ashamed.
We win by standing strong till the end. That is why you can’t afford to give up. Even if your husband has given up on the marriage, as long as you want your marriage transformed, God will birth that miracle you earnestly crave. Your prayers can influence God’s hand at any moment.
If you truly desire to see your marriage restored to wholeness, don’t be around people who tell you it can’t work. Pray that pain or disappointment you or your spouse feel will drive you both closer to God and not further away. Find good support systems; those who will pray along with you and encourage you.
In conclusion, love your spouse; even when all hope seems lost. God loves us even when we fail and disappoint Him. Don’t allow negative thoughts about yourself or your spouse dominate your mind. Rather, think positive and good thoughts because ‘as a man thinks in his heart, so is he’. Dare to love your spouse and see God work wonders on your behalf. God is not mocked, we will reap what we sow. If we love our spouse, we will in turn be loved. And because your hope is in the Lord, you will not be disappointed.