Many women often wonder how they can keep their men interested. As you two start to go out, at first things are going great but then you soon notice that there’s a bit of a drop-off. It’s almost as if his interest in you has waned. To fix things, you try to push. You try to edit yourself more in his favour and you try to do more for him.
Yeah, big mistake.
In fact, you’ve probably made two big mistakes. Kinda like having a fishhook stuck in your thumb and trying to get it out with another fishhook but then you just end up having two fishhooks stuck in your thumb.
Our advice? Read on.
Dating tips: How can you keep your man interested?
Relationships will always frustrate you until you understand this very important concept: Men need to be challenged. Men are aggressive by nature, and once they devour their prey, they’re off on the next hunt. This means that once a man feels he has you effectively under control, he will move on to the next prey that presents a greater challenge. As a rule, if you want to keep your man interested you should be elusive enough to keep the hunter hunting and accessible enough for him not to quit.
When he feels completely comfortable and content, you’ve lost him. You must keep some of the cookies in the jar. You want him to see the benefits of marrying you rather than keeping you merely as a girlfriend. These are the things that keep a hunter hunting. He can think you’re the finest thing walking the earth, but if you become the aggressor, taking his rightful place, he will divert his attention elsewhere. A hunter will hunt a prey who hides, one who runs, even one who bites, but hunters never hunt something that’s hunting them back.
You’re probably saying to yourself, I would never do such a thing, but I am willing to bet you’ve done it or you’re in the process of doing it right now. Here are ten tips that will help you keep the hunt alive:
- Don’t invite yourself to activities or complain that you weren’t invited. If he had wanted you to go along, he would have asked.
- Don’t invest in a man by moving to another city to be with him unless he invests in you first by putting a ring on your finger. Now, how often have you heard of one of your girlfriends doing this one?
- Don’t use shameful attempts to pressure him into marrying you. For example, don’t suggest going to look at engagement rings, don’t introduce him as your future husband, don’t put your friends up to questioning him about when he’s going to pop the question, and never try to trap him by getting pregnant. When a hunter sees what he wants, he will go after it.
- Eliminate the following phrases from your vocabulary: “Where is this going?” “I’m not going to date you forever.” “When are we getting married?” “I might be pregnant.”
- If you’ve chosen to abstain from sex until you’re married, don’t change your mind for fear of losing him. Stick to your morals and values. If he truly wants you, he will stay.
- Don’t abandon your friends, hobbies, or goals in an effort to be with him all the time. Keep a healthy lifestyle. Many women find the man they think is the one and they drop everything to pursue the relationship. Don’t do that.
- Don’t attempt to accommodate his every need. Leave something for marriage.
- If you choose to make sex a part of your relationship, don’t give up all the goods. Again, leave something for him after marriage.
- Don’t agree with everything he says. Freely voice your opinion. It’s better to find out you’re not compatible sooner than later. Besides, it’s obvious when you’re doing this.
- Never start doing anything you can’t continue doing for the duration of the relationship.
One more attempt to drive this point home: Men are not content to acquire “the low-lying fruit.” A friend of mine once told me that “Men can have hundreds of suitable apples all around their feet, but they’re not happy unless they go for that big, shiny apple on the highest branch.”
To keep your man interested, always keep the hunter hunting.