Compatibility has nothing to do with two perfect people coming together. It is simply finding someone who is well-matched, well-suited or like-minded. Being compatible means that there is evidently harmony between the two of you. This sort of compatibility extends beyond physical attraction, to emotional and spiritual like-mindedness. In the concluding part of this topic, Pastor Bimbo Odukoya’s talk focuses on compatibility.
It is important to know that to find a person compatible with you is a very serious task; it is a seeking and elimination process. It takes time to find; do not get discouraged even if it is taking years; remember, we are talking about choosing who you will spend the rest of your life with. To find a good and virtuous person will take time. Therefore do not get discouraged, do not be in a hurry. Eventually, it will be worth your while. At the end of the day when that good person comes, you will thank God you did things the right way.
You must be prayerful, God will lead you, but you will make the choice, God will not choose for you. God will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go. Somewhere in the world there is a person who is compatible with you socially, mentally, sexually, spiritually and God has made the person for you. God will lead you, but making the decision is your call. The reason is that if you are going to marry, you must be mature enough to make decisions.
The person you find must fit; if the person does not then he is not the right person for you. Two cannot walk together except they are agreed.
The first thing to do is to know yourself because if someone will walk with you, you need to understand yourself.
You should know whether you are an introvert or an extrovert and your partner must be able to accept you as such. The way you handle your spouse’s imperfections will determine the success or otherwise of your marriage.
Sex in marriage is important, without it marriage will be frustrating. Be prayerful that God will bring someone compatible with you. Do not base your sexual fulfilment on your past experiences and do not base your decision on sexual attraction alone.
If you are easily attracted to the opposite sex or easily moved, it is a sign that you are hot sexually and vice-versa. You can also ask your partner whether he is hot or cold however do not dwell on the topic for too long. Sex is good, but outside marriage is a sin.
Physical compatibility; physical attraction is associated with sexual attraction. You must be able to get along well. While you may have varying interests, you both must be willing to accept each other for who you are. Mind you, this does not mean that you should condone bad behaviour in a prospective spouse. It means that after you have done your due-diligence and have found this person to be ideal for you, accept his flaws because nobody is perfect. We are all works in progress.